Carrion

I’ve spent 20 years inside this body. 20 years not understanding why I felt so uncomfortable living with myself. I knew that this body would someday decay, rot, fossilize as bones. I want to spend my days cherishing the figure and form that I was born into.

I started taking testosterone injections on November 13th 2023. So many people ask “what if you regret it?” but I know I won’t, and this change will help me create a body and person that reflects who I truly am.

This project, Carrion, is about the death and the bittersweet feeling of losing my old self. How although things will be changing for the better a part of my past self will be gone. I think it’s a common trans experience to look back at your old self almost in pity and longing at the same time. I am proud of the person I’ve become, but seeing my former self die and rot away brings an indescribable feeling. I’ll always reminisce about her, and remember the loneliness and confusion she went through for me to get to where I am now.